Mara Fisher LCSW, MCC @ 5:35 pm
Presently I notice that we are in a culture that believes that awards and winning is what makes us most valued. It has led me to wonder what we are valuing. Have we learned to care more about our achievements than enjoying the fragrance of the ocean and the sound of the surf?
For a time in my life I worked for CYO (catholic youth organization). My job was to assist in the development of programs and speak with the parents of children whom were on the various sports teams. What we developed was the idea, (at the time it was revolutionary), that ‘winning is not everything’. I must say, the parents met us with negativity at the notion that it was okay to lose. The children were under enormous pressure and anxiety at every game. Sadly, some would be scolded by their parents if they did not win.
As this is the time of year for Award ceremonies. Soon we have the Oscars. We recently had the Golden Globes and the Grammy’s. In the Arts if you win it is true that your career might move and certainly for a year or two you will earn more money. Yet I cannot help but wonder about the children. What do they get? If their team wins, they get to feel loved by their parents and maybe teammates. But what about the children that loses. Do they know that they are loved?
Mara Fisher LCSW, MCC @ 10:17 pm
Many books have been written on the subject of boundaries. Is it possible to be an I and still be a We? Where do I end and my partner begin? Many of us have been pondering this notion.
I have noticed that when people are in a relationship they become concerned about getting lost within the life of the relationship? And yet some of us do keep our sense of self and do not get lost in the forest of relationship. While others forget to leave breadcrumbs when they go into relationship and so they get lost.
What prevents us from maintaining our identity in a relationship?
Perhaps we did not have a clear sense of self when we went into relationship and so the relationship became who we are. It is also possible that you lost your sense of self while in relationship while trying to accommodate the other person. It may be time for you to look for your I.
In all relationships there is some melding of identity. It is a matter of degree that determines whether you have entered an unhealthy realm of codependency or if you are in a healthy relationship that has achieved a deep level of intimacy.
What are your thoughts?
Mara Fisher LCSW, MCC @ 7:08 pm
I am amazed.
I have studied with many world renowned teachers. I have taught and continue to teach gratefulness and how to experience gratitude. So, last night at a Tony Bennett concert to my astonishment, which quickly turned into pure joy; to experience genuine gratitude…well what can I say. It was an ‘ah ha’ moment in my life. The audience was filled with love. The entertainer was filled with love for his audience. I could feel his gratefulness and gratitude for life. It brought tears of joy to many an eye, including mine.
It is impossible to predict how and when we will learn…and when we do it is simple and beautiful.
Mara Fisher LCSW, MCC @ 10:26 am
When I work with new parents the issue of mortality always comes up. It is interesting how until we have children we rarely, if ever think about dying and once we have them we do. Some people become frightened by their own mortality, others fear that their children will die and some fear both.
The reality is that when/if/how we die or the fact that we will die has not changed at all. Having children triggers our reptilian brains and we want to protect our young. As there is no certainty to our futures, we as parents are challenged by this uncertainty and confuse it with a fear of mortality.
Mara Fisher LCSW, MCC @ 11:40 pm
I have been thinking about consciousness, intuition and the connection between the two.
If we are Intuitive does it mean we are more conscious? Perhaps it just means we are more sensitive to our environment both the visible and the energetic. Perhaps we listen more intently with all our senses.
Intuition is key to making clear and correct decisions in our life.
Much too often we ignore our intuition. Allowing our intuition to guide us is a perfect way to make healthy choices.
What do you think?
Mara Fisher LCSW, MCC @ 9:45 pm
When you practice being in the moment or mindfulness, you are free of making judgments, and of having expectations of outcome.
Letting go is about being in the moment. It is about experiencing what is present right now.
As Thanksgiving is approaching it is a time for letting go.
Gratitude and remembrance of all you do have.
Breathe in the Love that is all around you…
