Tag: Career Advice

Respecting Differences

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I would be remiss if I didn’t mention the Presidential Election and how to respectfully handle the opinions of people in our world. The American Psychological Association’s study shows that a little more than half of people surveyed say that the election “is a very or somewhat significant” source of stress for them. From New York to California, fearful, frustrated and anxious clients are expressing their concerns about the campaign and the candidates to their therapists. The prospect of either Trump or Clinton winning the election has spurred contentious debate. By Wednesday morning, we will know who our President-Elect is; and while many will be rejoicing, others will be quite upset. It has been an election unlike any other – filled with tension and anger.

This is a really big deal to most of us, so, no matter what the outcome, avoid inflammatory statements and behaviors. Respect those around you who may not feel the same way that you feel, and in fact, will likely be very disappointed. Remember a recent post about there being more than one “right”? We all feel that we are “right”. The person that you are sitting next to at work or at the dinner table would appreciate the same level of respect that you would like if you were in their shoes.

We can show who we are as individuals when we disagree. Author Bryant McGill wrote, “grace in conflict is a study in love.” We have the ability to be that person – to be graceful, to be who we are and not let anything get the best of us. We can’t expect any one else to change, but we can. By our changing, we will change the environment. I often say, “Our actions are the way we define ourselves to others.” How do we want to affect the environment?

“Culture makes people understand each other better. And if they understand each other better in their soul, it is easier to overcome the economic and political barriers. But first they have to understand that their neighbour is, in the end, just like them, with the same problems, the same questions.”  ~ Paulo Coelho


The Importance of Keeping Good Company: Finding Your Five



Think about it for a moment; who do you spend most of your time with? Draw a few people into your mind, and expand on this thought, what beauty do you find  those people bringing to your life? Do those who’ve come to mind create a calm, positive environment when you’re around them, or are they a perfect storm of chaos? It may not be something that you regularly think about – but this examination may be incredibly important to your success, both personally and professionally. 
Entrepreneur.com recently highlighted “Why the Five People Around You Are Crucial to Your Success,” prefacing  on the idea that in business, and life, “You’re the average of the five people you spend most of your time with,” according to renowned business guru Jim Rohn; a fascinating man who boasts an incredible forty year history of helping people around the world “sculpt life strategies that have expanded their imagination of what is possible” in both business and beyond. 
In the article, they note: “You need people —whether it’s co-founders, mentors family or friends – who will challenge you and make you better, thereby raising your average or helping you maintain a high one. Many entrepreneurs strive to be the smartest person in the room on every issue. But if you’re always the smartest person, you’re hurting yourself. You want to surround yourself with people who can run circles around you in as many areas as possible, people who are exponentially better in a variety of ways.”
It makes sense, right? Not just for entrepreneurs, but for our own everyday lives. Those who are more in-tune or creative in one part of life, definitely help build our strength when it may be a natural weakness of ours. A lot of times, they too, will help us become more confident in that skill, and help us to develop it further – challenging us to become our best self, bit by bit. 
So, if we all do need those fabulous five in our lives; how do we choose them? It’s harder said than done. Especially to identify and utilize these people in the most mutually beneficial way without  feeling like we cast others we love outside of ‘our circle.’ It’s also difficult to discern what would make someone ‘more valuable’ than someone else when we love different people for different gifts that they bestow upon our lives. 
It may sound overwhelming, yes, but never fear! Here are three tips to developing a ‘personal board of directors’ in a way that feels natural and fair to the nuances and specialities of all of your interpersonal relationships:
1. Don’t make it personal. Many times, we love the most important people in our lives just as they are –  and unconditional love is a good thing! For this exercise, however, allow yourself to see beyond love and identify your closest confidants who exhibit  the most positive and consistent high-quality traits for you to emulate that will enhance your personal and professional life. 
2. Open Yourself Up to Others. One of your five may not necessarily be who you’d expect – that’s great! In fact, the more self-reflective you are when identifying this group, the more likely you are to identify the right people for the right reasons, as mentioned above. When you allow yourself to be open to examining your relationships honestly, the choices will be clear to you. 
3. Be aware of YOU. Without examining ourselves –  identifying our best traits and attributes in our character that we’d like to strengthen – we won’t be able to find the qualities in others that best suit our needs. And, most important of all, the reciprocal, we won’t be able to meet the needs of those in our lives who need us to be in their boat with them. 
You’re on your way now to finding your five; and that’s exciting. Here is something even more incredible to feel blessed about today: Everyone else is still there! 
Each one of the people that you didn’t add to this small, albeit important, list is still on your team cheering you on. They may not be in your ‘boardroom’ but they’re everywhere else in your life!  Remember to celebrate those gifts, too, no matter how great or small, every day. 

Are You Limiting Yourself?

What you choose to believe will dictate many facets of your life. Society has a lot to say to us, about us. It likes to tell us we’re too small to make a difference in the world or we don’t have what it takes to be what we want to be. And you know what? Many of us believe these societal lies – and once we believe something, it becomes a part of who we are; it is grafted into the patterns of our thinking.

What are your beliefs about yourself?

In this blog post, I’d like to identify some common, restrictive beliefs and show you how to go from limited to limitless. Let’s get started…

Restrictive Belief #1 – ‘I’m too small to make a difference in this world.’

While it is true that you are just one person, when you believe that you do not have the power within yourself to positively impact the world around you, you become a carrier of negative energy – in other words, you become limited. Limiting yourself in this way leaves no room for abundant thinking.

APPLICATION- Want to kick start abundance in your own mind?:

Begin with gratitude. Think gratefully of the positive qualities you do possess: ‘I’m thoughtful, empathetic, smart, educated, strong…etc, and I’m thankful for these attributes.’ Through this exercise, you will have opened the door to making a difference, and your possibilities will become limitless.

Restrictive Belief #2 – ‘I’m not courageous enough.’

Nelson Mandela once said, “I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it. The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid, but he who conquers that fear.” Okay, so you’re afraid to do something. Maybe you’re trying to overcome your fear of switching careers or starting a family.

APPLICATION- Want to overcome your fear?:

Acknowledge it. Look it straight in the eye and don’t be the first to look away. You see, once you sit with whatever it is that causes you to be afraid, that thing becomes less scary, less powerful. Through this exercise, you will become the victor, and in Mandela’s wise words, you will “triumph over it.”

Restrictive Belief #3 – ‘I don’t have enough time in a day.’

Time is a funny thing in that when we’re experiencing hardship, it seems to go on forever, yet when we’re having fun, time flies by. Rarely does it feel like we have just the right amount of time to accomplish everything on our to do list.

APPLICATION- Want to feel like you have enough time?:

Create it. Don’t let your looming deadlines and the ticking of the clock dictate your daily life; instead, rise an hour earlier and get ahead. You may even find incredible rejuvenation in rising early to experience some well-deserved quiet time. Take the reigns and set your own rules. Remember, you’re the one wearing the watch; it’s not wearing you!

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Take a few moments to ask yourself what you believe. You might be surprised to see what comes up. Open yourself to a limitless mindset and let abundance flow in.