Tag: gratitude

Gratitude, The Reality Changer

It’s true – gratitude has the power to change things. I would venture to say, that it serves at the catalyst to change one’s circumstances. It begins with choosing to be grateful, and that choice ignites a positive domino effect that leads to actual change. I know some of you must be thinking that I’m crazy. How can one’s thinking change one’s reality? How can choosing to be grateful turn a seemingly upsetting situation into a blessing? Read on and you’ll find out.

Neale Donald Walsch, author of the acclaimed series, Conversations with God, said: “…gratitude completely shifts the context from which we consider, observe, witness or experience any outward event, circumstance or situation. Perspective creates perception, and perception creates belief; belief creates behavior. Behavior creates experience, and experience creates your reality.” Walsch articulates the dominoes in play here, so let’s list them: Gratitude, Perspective, Perception, Belief, Behavior, Experience and Reality.

  • Gratitude – a feeling of appreciation or thanks
  • Perspective – the capacity to view things in their true relations or relative importance
  • Perception – the way you think about or understand someone or something
  • Belief – a feeling of being sure that someone or something exists or that something is true
  • Behavior – the way something [or someone] moves, functions or reacts
  • Experience – the process of doing and seeing things and of having things happen to you
  • Reality – the true situation that exists: the real situation

* Definitions from Merriam Webster (merriam-webster.com)

Feeling turns to understanding, to knowing, to acting… to experiencing

An Applicable Lesson

[Story complements of a dear friend]

I got home from a long day at work. I was exhausted and I walked into a disheveled house. Shoes scattered across the living room, my toddler’s toys sprinkled generously over the entirety of the floor, the beds unmade…the works. My husband had arrived home a short time before me, and what was he doing? Watching TV and barely paying attention to our little one. Dinner had to be made, bath time had to take place, shoes and toys had to be put away – so much had to be done and I would have to do it all!

Frustration quickly set in and I realized I was at a crossroads. I could choose to let frustration flourish into anger, and create a tense atmosphere for my whole family, including myself. OR I could take a deep breath, kiss my loved ones hello and take a moment to be thankful for my circumstance. Yes, the house was much less clean than I would have liked and yes, there was a lot that had to be checked off of my list before I could put my head down on the pillow and get some rest, but as much as those things were true, something was even more TRUE. What was it? The reality that my life was really very blessed.

The truth is that I have a home filled with the laughter of an energetic and ever-growing toddler. I have a hard working husband who deserves to put his feet up for a moment after a long day at the office. I have food and the means to prepare it for my family – and I have this day…this precious day. I am not guaranteed tomorrow, but I have right now, and right now, my reality is pretty wonderful!

What is YOUR story? What is your Attitude? What is your reality?

Do you need some help parsing out your reality? Do you need some help learning to see the beauty through the barriers of life? Those barriers (shoes, toys, whatever they may be) sure cloud our vision, don’t they? They sure do a good job of blocking the beauty! But it’s there – you just need to look for it.

Interested in more information? Contact Master Certified Coach & licensed psychotherapist: Mara Fisher, LCSW, MCC, at www.BridgeofLife.com or +1305-754-7246


Peace, Happiness, You, I, Us…

The elusive desire for happiness often leads to consuming as much as possible. To have the biggest house, not just one but as many as we can afford to buy and furnish. To have the most expensive cars, clothing jewelry. We often think that the more we own, the bigger it is, the more expensive it is, the happier we will be. So why then are so many people, who have all that they thought they wanted unhappy? We thought if only we had one more room on our house or just one more bathroom, everything would be great. If only I earned a little more money? Perhaps if I lived in another city or country?

The void that we as humans feel cannot be filled by ‘things’. As corny as it sounds and it does to some degree sound corny to me, John Lennon, Rumi and many others may have been correct in that love is the answer.

We strive to be the best at everything and pass this down to our children. While pregnant, before our potential children have taken their 1st breath, we are competing for them to be in the best pre-schools. To be the best, to own the most, and still those that do, are not happy. So what are we doing wrong?

Rumi the 13th century poet said: “There is a candle in your heart, ready to be kindled. There is a void in your soul, ready to be filled. You feel it, don’t you?”

The void is part of who we as humans are. What I come across over and over again are people who are in search of meaning. Wishing to understand one’s purpose on earth; to achieve something that will make us think we have fulfilled a purpose. To fill the emptiness of not knowing, not understanding so much about how we came to be here and why, we turn to religions, consuming, gambling, drugs, over-eating; all in an attempt to fill the void of our not ‘knowing’ how to just be. To breathe in and smile with the exhale, to live in a house that serves our needs rather than our ego’s, with an Eco-friendly car.

Allowing ourselves to stop feeling and acting greedy, to live with what we actually need rather than feeding our ego’s and the illusion that we can fill the void by consuming. The void can only be filled with love. By letting go of greed we will and can develop compassion and empathy for others. That homeless person on the street, whom we just drove or walked by; perhaps we can share with him/her a bit of our abundance. To share, to think in terms of the ‘us’ rather than the ‘I’. Carl Jung, speaks of the collective unconscious and many people believe this happens after one dies. I think it can happen while we are alive…it is about the ‘us’. Peace within and without is possible when we fill the void with love.


Gratefulness – my ‘ah ha’ moment

I am amazed.

I have studied with many world renowned teachers. I have taught and continue to teach gratefulness and how to experience gratitude. So, last night at a Tony Bennett concert to my astonishment, which quickly turned into pure joy; to experience genuine gratitude…well what can I say. It was an ‘ah ha’ moment in my life. The audience was filled with love. The entertainer was filled with love for his audience. I could feel his gratefulness and gratitude for life. It brought tears of joy to many an eye, including mine.

It is impossible to predict how and when we will learn…and when we do it is simple and beautiful.


Gratitude

When you practice being in the moment or mindfulness, you are free of making judgments, and of having expectations of outcome.

Letting go is about being in the moment. It is about experiencing what is present right now.

As Thanksgiving is approaching it is a time for letting go.

Gratitude and remembrance of all you do have.

Breathe in the Love that is all around you…