Bridge of Life

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A satisfying sexual relationship is an important part of intimacy, which is what most people are actually looking for when they use the term chemistry. A first date is just an introduction to a person’s immediate personality— take them at face value. If you’re interested in what they have to say and feel respected and comfortable, that’s an important and positive first step.

Think of the situation reflexively, wouldn’t you want someone to give you a few opportunities to make a good impression? Nervousness, self-consciousness, and other self-sabotaging scenarios can hinder what may be an underlying connection—if you’re comfortable, give the date another chance.

It’s important to note, how much chemistry you feel on a first date will not in any way determine what kind of sexual relationship you will have in a long-term relationship with a partner. In order to want to have sex with a man, you will want to feel a chemistry or attraction, however just because you do not feel it right away, it doesn’t mean it won’t develop over time turning into a great relationship.

If you’re not feeling a spark after the first date, but still share similar interests and values to your own, try a six date rule. If you’re still not feeling connected, it’s probably time to move on. For many women, chemistry grows as they get to know a person. As the connection progresses, you may find yourself swayed from the initial uncertainty, feeling a deeper desire for this individual.

There will always be personal differences and desires in our sexual relationship; the key is to find the balance. Remember that people, both men and women, have different sex drives. It’s important to have open communication with your partner to best serve both your individual and collective needs. As you begin to experience a strong sexual connection, the chemistry you feel will begin to flourish and help to create a long healthy relationship.

The honeymoon phase, which spans from anywhere from six months to one and a half years, will feel full and exciting. After that point, sex for most couples slows down but the chemistry will remain. Allow yourself to be open and communicative from the beginning, that will help to create a solid foundation of understanding.

Lastly, before you continue down the path of dating, it’s imperative to make sure you have a good sense of self. Know what you’re looking for, what your boundaries are and what you bring to the table. Happiness begins internally—understanding who you are and what you want long-term will help you attract Mr. Right instead of Mr. Right Now.

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